Wednesday, May 7, 2008
All right, it's been long since I've blogged. Well, a few things I would like to update.
A Story of YOU
Title: You Don’t Deserve It
Author: Zile
Specially Dedicated To: Ahtnamas
First of all, to YOU (you know who you are), I have never regretted all my decisions I have made throughout this period of time, YOU are the one who made my life H+E+L+L. I gave you the respect when you didn’t deserved it, assisted you when you needed, covered for you when I did not need to, and you know when it was. Under many circumstances when I could have reported the truth, I chose to kept quiet, for I felt that if I were to make things ugly, it would do none of us benefit. Many circumstances when I could have exploded, I kept my calm, and told myself that, this is for myself, to bow low, to learn humility, to bring myself further.
However, I have come to realise that after so long, after giving you the respect which you so clearly needed, you do not change, you do not show any gratitude to those around you, those who helped you. But instead, you chose to do things the way you deem fit, till the point of unreasonable, irritating attitude of yours no one can stand.
Let me tell you this, you should seriously thank yourself and thank God that you are what you are today. No doubt, you work hard, and yes, indeed you are very hardworking, when it comes to serious business. But learn this, at times, do not be too obstinate, and admit that you are not perfect. I am not saying that I am perfect, after all, isn’t it perfectly normal that humans err? The important thing is that, when you know that you have done wrong, be brave enough to admit it, no matter at what position you are at today. Because however high you may be at, remember that you might fall one day, and there might not be anyone down there to catch you.
Also remember that, to be a leader, you need to have followers, and you need them to be proud of you, need them to support you, because you can never achieve anything alone, or even if you can, might be a minor success. It most definitely cannot be compared to a success that others help you to achieve. Self-satisfaction cannot be compared to team-satisfaction, if you know what I mean.
When you have clearly done wrong, even to your followers, be brave enough to admit it, to say you are sorry, to ask for forgiveness even. And your followers will be proud of you, will admire you for your courage, and will be more than willing to forgive you, and work even harder to help you in any way they can. And in that way, even if one day you may fall, there are people down there to catch you, to give you support, to lessen your pain when you fall, to be your cushion. Or else, if there is no one down there to catch you when you fall, you will hurt, a lot more hurt. Bear that in mind.
I seriously do not think you have what it takes to be a leader, if you are to still continue in this manner of treating those around you, especially your followers. Try being yourself for another period of time and you will see what I mean, that you will fall terribly. If you need examples of what I mean, I can give you tons.
During the overseas trip a few months ago, you were the one who turned down a potential who expressed interest in going for the trip. When she came to hand in her details for the trip, you plainly turned down her request to join the rest for the trip, stating to me that she was too late and arrangements could not be made for her to join the trip, when in actual fact, it was not a matter of not being able to do it, but a matter of you not willing to do it for her. When she made a complaint to the management and the top came down to it during a meeting, I spoke, but you stopped me, and I kept my silence, and you gave a fake reason for that, and I kept my silence, as I didn’t want to humiliate you in front of others, but deep down, I lost all respect for you. You are not one to stand up for your own actions, I knew then.
I do think that I have what it takes to succeed, but you did not give me the chance to prove myself. Pardon me for saying this, but it is from the bottom of my heart. You obstructed me in many ways, took a lot of my credit away from me, and claimed it as your own. Think about it and you will know what I am talking about. You gave me work to do, which was your own, and claimed it as yours when it was well done, and pushed me into fire when it was criticised. You even refused me the right to write whatever I thought deemed fit in my reports, for fear of letting others know that a lot of things were my work, and several times refused me the right to cc copy my reports to others, as you always took my reports and claimed it as yours. Though it may be late to say this now, still I feel that I need to make myself clear, and only then will I feel better. The many circumstances where you have wronged me, maligned me, but never gave me the chance of speaking up and never giving me the chance to prove myself. Do not say that if I wanna prove myself no one can stop me, no, reality is not like this. Cause if someone has all intentions to obstruct you from the road to success, it is difficult for you to make it, especially when that person is in a much higher position than you.
Seriously speaking, I learnt zero from you. Nothing. Nil. It was those around me and you that taught me many things. I learnt what I have learnt today from them. I am what I am today because of them.
A big thanks to you guys who have helped me along the way, taught me and made me become who I am today. You guys know who you are.
The many leaders that surround me and you, they have proved themselves worthy of my respect, in all areas.
They stood by me, stood up for me, gave me advise deep from their hearts when they thought what I did was wrong, they taught me whatever they could, never once got fed up with me when I was slow in learning, patiently coaching me, discussing with me about many problems faced, never once shouted in my face. Unlike you, shouted and screamed, even in front of others, never once spared a thought for my feelings, for the image of ourselves as well as others. Unlike you, who talked about the most confidential secrets to even others who should not be involved. You get what I am talking about.
To be a leader, you help your follower succeed, help them climb further and higher, and not to push them down lower. 下属的不服, 是身为一位领导者最大的失败.
Also, at times, it is important to watch your self –image, especially when it comes to the opposite sex. Cause you may not know it, but others definitely hear a lot about it. When those around you hear about your gossip, when others ask about you, we feel ashamed to face it. No, it is not because we do not know how to handle it, but because the truth is out there, the scandal is known and seen by everybody, and when faced with it, how do we answer? It is a disgrace, when clearly you have a boyfriend but still openly allowed yourself to flirt with others. Bear in mind that your actions do have an impact on others, and a serious one. It not only causes embarrassment to those around you, but also causes a lot of unwelcomed feelings that others might feel towards us. You may not know it, but it does indeed have a great deal of impact to those around you. When the truth is known and seen by everyone, there is no choice that those around you have to suffer the embarrassment that you have caused. Ironic that you said to us, instructed us to keep a distance from a particular someone and to watch our words, when you yourself told him about information that was supposed to be confidential, huh? When you yourself flirted and went in and out of the office every single day with him, God, sending you to work, sending you home, going for lunch and dinner and supper, and even MSNing when the both of you are just five feet away from each other. God, you seriously think that the people around you are dead? Or are the people around you all born in the 13th month? Wake up girl. You are not worthy of my respect, and many others do not have any respect for you as well. You wanted respect from me, and at all times reminded me that you are my superior. However, let me remind you that respect has to be earned, and not given. Tell me in what area do you deserve my respect???
I have said my piece, and I do hope that you put some thought into what I have written here today and hopefully, treat others a little bit better. Do not think too highly of yourself, do not over-estimate. Learn the essence of humility.
Watch yourself at all times, or there will be another one just like me, just like others. Mark my words.
++++++++++The End++++++++++
Ok, I have got myself a new job: Freelance Market Surveyor.
Which means I work freelance, on my own timing, only go back to the office when I have reports to hand in. I work on my own, I get the opportunity to travel overseas with my boss! Chio not?
Best thing is the pay, I would consider myself very lucky indeed, to be able to receive this kinda salary.
I’ve always believed that whatever happens always lead to another good beginning.
Oh, I haven’t started working yet, thought I might give myself some time off, to relax and spend some time with my loved ones. In any case, I can start work anytime I want, so no pressure.
This family that I am staying with, has a very cute baby. Just take a look.
Awww, isn’t he just adorable??!!! I play with him everyday now that I am not working, especially when his mother is busy cooking.
It’s so nice to be a tai-tai hor.. To sleep late and wake up late, to watch tv till dawn and eat every single meal with your loved ones. Hmmm, I shall make time for my friends now. Meifen, I’m coming!!! Wait for me ar!!! I must must must enjoy myself before I bury myself in work again.
I’m one step closer to my dream dream dream dream dream~~~~~
And I’m feeling so relaxed now~~ Sigh contendedly~~~
ThAt LaDy @ 10:04 PM
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